A shining light and good news story from Sunday’s game for which we are all grateful.
That 'victory' felt soooooo hollow. Couldn’t stand and clap at the end. Let alone sing the song. No joy. No relief. No surprise. Just pissed off!
Ok, have to admit it. In the end, we did sing along.
Bu even everyone’s favourite blue sky miner, Whispering Ted, didn’t seem to have his heart in. His cartwheels looked subdued.
So, the team of Whispering Ted (back from his holiday/s), Aaron and Rodger have just finished the anal-ysis of Sunday’s ‘performance’. And like the Muller report, the findings failed to show any collusion. (Or cohesion.) Between the coaching panel, the players, and ‘smart footy’.
Unfortunately we were missing a few our team regulars. Johnny declared that he couldn’t sit through it all. He walked out muttering something about the club’s ‘summer of renewal’ and pulp fiction. Barks4Eva is in another town, or universe, but it’s one without a reliable internet connection. Whilst Con has to sort out some issues pertaining to obtaining the services of a nanny.
Back to the game.
Sure, despite the best efforts of the scumpires and our so-called coaching brains trust, sure, we did get the four points, by one point, but.................................
We played the worst team in the comp'.
We played the worst team in the comp', who haven’t replaced Lynch or May.
We played the worst team in the comp', who haven’t replaced Lynch or May, at (what passes for) our home ground Linton Lodger Stadium.
We played the worst team in the comp', who haven’t replaced Lynch or May, at (what passes for) our home ground Linton Lodger Stadium, and they were a man down from very early on.
We played the worst team in the comp', who haven’t replaced Lynch or May, at (what passes for) our home ground Linton Lodger Stadium, they were a man down from very early on, and they were effectively two men down soon after.
A true win for the true deceivers!
We did try hard though.
Right to the bitter end, we tried so bloody hard. We tried so bloody hard to lose.
- We’re under pressure deep in defence, a one point lead, and only minutes left. Yet, we left Lonie alone against four surfer dude dole bludgers out on their half forward flank. That’s four to one! Actually, given Lonie’s size, it’s closer to eight to one. And of course, that's exactly where Billing’s Hail Mary clearing kick went.
- Josh the Bruce had to take that mark, only because a minute earlier, we decided not run down the clock by playing a little keepings-off on the wing. You know, make the dole bludgers have to actually man up, instead of lazily flooding back. Nope. Default tactic. Long bomb. To their flood! (To their flood at CH bloody F! We didn’t even kick long down the boundary towards our forward pocket!) They (of course) then took it almost the length of the ground, and only an heroic spoil prevented a dole bludger surfer dude taking a shot on goal to potentially win them the game. Rope-a-bloody-dope!
- And don't we still love the long bomb! Doesn't even matter if there are no tall forwards to bomb it to. (Because Bruce had to ruck, because our selection committee Brain Spacers didn't pick Marshall!)
Here they are at last week’s selection meeting. Mapping out our whole season. Timely.
And it certainly doesn't matter if we have short options on their own some in prime positions. Options whom any Little Leaguer who understands ‘smart’ footy would choose to kick to. Nope. Rope-a-bloody-dope!
- As expected, our undersized defence (more Brain Spacer genius tactics) struggled, though manfully, against the opposition’s tall timber. Shudder to think what will happen though against an actual football team. You know. One that can actually get the ball into their forward 50 a decent number of times during a game.
And to think, as has been widely reported and commented on, the coach told us that the penny had finally actually bloody dropped for him, and it was time to instil 'smart footy' into his genius Brain Space game plan. ‘Smarts’? The missing secret ingredient? Well, it still seems to be a secret. And it’s still bloody well missing!
The analysis committee is still reeling from performing the anal-ysis of that footage of some of our inept efforts in the frantic closing minutes of that match.
Stuff to like/ all is not lost:
- The performance of our mature age debutantes.
- Josh Battle – especially the results of his DNA test, apparently. (Except that his DNA should be in the forward line.)
- Josh ‘the criminally underrated’ Bruce is back!
- The sun did actually come up the next day.
- Lonie. Still don’t think he’s a long term keeper. But credit where it’s due. He continued on from last year’s late form. We are currently checking the astronomical reports, hoping to find the Saints scheduled to play a game under a blue moon. If so, we may all yet get to see Lonie stick a tackle.
- The players were reportedly stoked over the hard fought win.
- Paddy did not pick up another concussion. (We think.....?)
- Hannebery went as well as expected. (And he’s even left some talcum powder for use after the showers. Next week’s opposition will appreciate that.)
And depending on which part of the PoxSport article one believes, he has quietly stepped away from being demoted from the leadership group due to needing to concentrate on hamstring ‘awareness/unawareness’/leadership ‘awareness/unawareness’.
https://www.foxsports.com.au/afl/afl-20 ... b82769b287
There are also unconfirmed reports emerging (from the Muller Report?) that Seb Ross and a player identified by the Pox Report only as Jarry Geary are also stepping away from the leadership group to concentrate on their ‘awareness’ of how to hit a target on the footy field.
- Back to the good news. Hanners' new fitness, awareness and agility programme is off to a promising start.
- Our 'manfully Battling' defence needs to be, and will be, tightened up for next week.
viewtopic.php?f=2&t=96666&p=1780067#p1780067
- Only five more rounds/ two more Prime Ministers till we can finally go the long bomb with the coach! (Please take your senior assistants with you.)
Opposition Player to Bag:
No contest. AR Richardson. Another delusional off-season. And on Sunday, another delusional post-match presser.
Wot duh!?!:
- Letting the kids (young and old) onto the Linton Lodger Stadium for a bit of a kick post match was a great move. Bringing back beloved footy traditions is always a great thing.
But why was the session for only 38 seconds??? (Why wasn’t the coach’s post match presser for only 38 seconds???)
And why was the whole centre square area cordoned-off for those 38 seconds? To protect the surface? Seriously? The goal squares weren’t cordoned off. Besides, the sink hole that opened mid match was near the interchange area, which also wasn’t cordoned off.
- The 666 netball rule/farce. Didn’t help the Demons. And didn’t stop the uber-flooding. Why not just do the bleedin’ obvious? Cut, and keep cutting, the interchange numbers, till the desired result is achieved. It’s really not that hard.
- Gresh's report!
Joke! Nothing in it.viewtopic.php?f=2&t=96666&p=1780066#p1780066
Next week’s ins/outs, something like,
IN:
Marshall!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Brown!
Acres!
OUT:
Bloody hell, NOT Pierce – we need Pierce and Marshall! To-bloody-gether!!!!! (Or Lazar.)
Kent.
Sinclair.
Savage.
The coach (we wish).
STIFF AS:
Savage (but he’s not the future).
Kent.
Clarke.
Young and Hind.
(Not Geelong coach Chris Kray though. Apparently.
)Thoughts, Johnny?
Thoughts, Saintsationalists?
